A Simple Test

Hey, Knuckles is alive. Got this nasty viral bug thing or something that isn’t responding to Johnny Walker Black therapy. Maybe a single malt will do the trick...

(Sound of overly medicated head hitting the keyboard.)

Three hours later...

Wha-? Oh right. So Johnny’s been going through a pile of his old sketchbooks. Some of the observations aren’t that crappy so they’ll be posted here. This is from a sketchbook written in the mid 90s. Had no idea at the time that they’d ever be read by anyone outside of a police forensics team.

10 Ways to Know If You’re a Liberal.

1. You love humanity but hate people.
2. You define rich as anyone who earns more money than you.
3. You believe that government should run everyone’s life except your own.
4. You believe that Stalin and Hitler could have used their absolute power as a force of good.
5. You have an endless supply of labels for your enemies without ever attaching one to yourself.
6. You distrust the free market’s invisible hand but trust Big Brother’s iron fist.
7. You claim to be a religious skeptic but never question primitive or New Age beliefs.
8. Your education could be better described as indoctrination. e.g. A liberal cannot remember hearing any of their teachers attributing any positive actions to Ronald Reagan.
9. You distrust the “hard left” and the “extreme right” and claim you have a solution “somewhere in the middle.”
10. You can only win elections by masquerading as a libertarian or conservative.

Okay, so it was kinda crappy. Lissen, Knuckles has some really juicy stuff written somewhere here. Mighta been in that sketchbook from the winter of ’97...